MAN MOVIE MONTH

The Die Hard Quintilogy or HOW TO SPEND HALF A DAY

Die hard
The classic. When flying with a gun was ok. When smoking in public was ok. When Carl Winslow was the standard in policemen.

So some "terrorists" take over an office building and want to get into some stuff and take a bunch of hostages/kill a bunch of innocents. A few angry Europeans, few 80s boobs, 4-5 cars wrecked, 1 helicopter wrecked, 1 police armored vehicle wrecked, probably a building that will need a renovation, and one of those parts where one guy laughs and then 2 guys laugh, and then everyone is laughing and then SOMETHING SERIOUS HAPPENS.

What can we learn from the original die hard? Put your shoes on.

Die hard 2: die harder
The classic sequel. When tazers on airplanes were ok. When east coast vs west coast was a thing. When naked tai chi and room service still happened.

So a deposed cocaine baron dictator is the "first arrest in the drug war" in the "90s" and he's on his way to Dulles, a great airport in Wash DC. A gang of traitorish ex military bros take over the airport. 2 planes are wrecked, 2-3 snowmobiles done for, and a church that's gonna need a Johnny 5 bomb squad.

What can we learn from die hard 2? The white zone is for loading and unloading only.

Die hard 3: with a vengeance
A buddy comedy reinterpretation of the classic. Picked for a job he didn't choose, Lt John McClain heads to Harlem for a lesson in what not to do with a sandwich board. There, he meets Samuel motherfuckin Jackson and they joke about racism and stuff.

Demolition report: 1 storefront, many cars, a couple dumptrucks, a bank, a tanker boat, a helicopter, and 1 Christmas carol (partridge in a pear tree).

What can we learn from part 3? Don't be racist or hold a grudge.

Die hard 4: with a vengeance
Modern reinterpretation of the classic, with computers.

LOTS of sarcasm in the first 5 minutes. Add the guy that was in the computer commercial with a scraggly teenager dirt-stache and you got a movie marketed toward the younger generation. There's even parkour.

The damage: hundreds? of cars in fender benders, a few helicopters, a semi and trailer, a F35 plane, a bunch of highway infrastructure, millions probably billions in stuff and other stuff.

What can we learn? There's tough and there's stupid, kids hate creedence,

Die hard 5: a good day to die hard

In Russia the hard dies you or something. John McClain is SO OLD. The show is prefaced with johns daughter begging him to not make "an even bigger mess of things." We'll you know what folks, there's gonna be a mess and its gonna be bigger. TONS of subtitles, this is not a film for the illiterate. The girl from ipanima is played in an elevator, how's that for culture?

What got broke: hundreds of cars totaled, rare chandeliers (great mixtape btw), 1 helicopter, a building in Chernobyl. Honesty, I expected more.

What can we learn? Lower your expectations.

COMMANDO AKA DIE HARD:THE PREQUEL, BEST 80s ACTION MOVIE? or BEST 80s ACTION MOVIE EVER?

Ahnold S. is in this one, if you werent familiar, and popular lore says that DIE HARD was supposed to be the sequel to this flick. Wow. Awesome. Prett much goes like this:

Ahnold eats a sandwich:

Someone drives a car through the dealership window, killing/wounding a salesman (classic!):

Ahnold gets some guns and plays with face paint:

I wish I could have taken more photos from this show but blah de blah copyright blah blah you wouldnt download a pizza?

 

What can we learn from this movie? Drive a bulldozer through the surplus store window and you're bound to find a bazooka.

Escape from New York: Badass cast of Badasses

Snake Plisskin, a name a really awesome mother would name their child. This is a ESCAPE movie with Lee van Cleef, Isaac Hayes, Ernest Borgnine and Kurt Russell. John Carpenter is an awesome director and uses awesome explosions, sweet
guns, gliders and chicken-style car chases through bomb-booby-trapped bridges.

Awesome movie and kind of relative to the current occupation of New York, considering the plane was being flown by an aviatrix/activist for the "workers".

What manliness can be learned from this movie? Stand up for yourself and stick it to the man.

MAN MOVIE MONTH IS BACK, IN DAY FORM!

While my wife is in her second term of clay class, I've got a MAN MOVIE NIGHT. Now, you all remember how successful MAN MOVIE MONTH was in it's first iteration (6000 hits in a month, what, actually, i dont really care about how many people visit the website because tracking your internet popularity is like worse that something kind of bad.), well now it's back! Except it's Tuesday nights, and I might be able to watch 1 movie a week. If you have any requests or questions, comment on the pages and I'll eagerly do my best to get back to you.

 

Rambos: first blood was good

There's one more photo I want to add from Rambo (the 4th one) but I'm posting this from my rotary phone and it only allows 5 photos.

Here's what to learn:
1. Don't get fat
2. Remember what you're here for
3. Try not to be a victim of circumstance, try to be an active posi force for the world

THE GREAT ESCAPE: PRISONERS OF WAR GET AWAY FROM CAPTORS

Steve McQueen counts on his fingers. Impressive.

He also rides a motorcycle in a field which totally looks like fun.

James Coburn continues to remind us that he's not cool and steals a bike.

 

What can we learn from THE GREAT ESCAPE?

1. Don't steal bikes bro

2. Pay attention in maths class

3. Don't freak out when you're digging a tunnel and some parts of it start to collapse. Things are gonna be alright.

 

Tonight: MARKED FOR DEATH

Tomorrow: RAMBO RETROSPECTIVE

DIRTY DOZEN: I WOULD GUESS THIS IS THE SAME AS THE EXPENDABLES IN 1944

Obvious last supper scene

The dirty dozen is a story about a misfit, rag tag group of war criminals given one last chance to clear their names. Some die, some live, some make jokes, some are creeps.

Manliness that can be learned:

1. You can still be good

 

Last night: THE GREAT ESCAPE

Tonight: MARKED FOR DEATH

NORTH BY NORTHWEST: AWESOME

Cary Grant was kidnapped and forced to drink

Then, he's gifted an identity (opposite of identity theft), dons the only disguise one should ever need

wit. can't buy that.

Your significant other will like this movie and you will too. It is good.

 

What manliness can you learn from North by Northwest?

1. Sunglasses: great disguise

2. Don't say mean things, just dont say it.

 

Tonight: THE 2 FAST & 2 FURIOUS FRANCHISE

Tomorrow: Lone Wolf McQuade

MAN MOVIE MONTH: MID MONTH REVIEW

While my wife (www.brittanypowell.com) is out of town at an artist residency (www.calderaarts.org) , I'm watching a manly movie every night.

Good news:

1. I've learned how to format images correctly

2. I've learned that I can ride my bike on the trainer instead of sitting on my lazy bum during movies

3. Sweet Onion flavor Kettle brand chips are really good.

 

Bad News: 

1. "Manly" movies get kind of boring. Of the 20-or-so I've watched since the beginning of the month, about 3 were fantastic. The rest is pretty much garbage.

2. I'm definitely not bike riding the calories I'm gaining from the sweet onion chips

3. I've got 15 more days of man movies to watch. Please, send me requests and suggestions.

 

Awesome news:

1. Here's a photo of my wife(Brittany Powell)'s awesome project and our dog, Gretta.

PREDATOR PLETHORA: YELL AT SOMETHING

Predator (1987)

Predator 2 (1990)

AVP: Alien Vs. Predators (2004)

Predators (2010)

 

Tonight: Our Man Flint

Tomorrow: TBD