MAN MOVIE MONTH

Ip Man and Ip Man 2: Propaganda/Wing Chun at it's finest

Ip man is about Master Yip, a Kung Fu teacher in 1930s small town (Foshan) China.  There are many competing Kung Fu houses in this small town and a few thugs come through to challenge the Masters. One thing leads to another and the Japanese invade. Modestly, some of the Kung Fu Masters are challenged by the resident Japanese General and well,

Master Yip humbly requests to fight 10 men. Well, that story goes on, he ends up fighting the General in a public bout ... aaaand we come to

IP MAN 2

based in Hong Kong, Master Yip starts his own kung fu school. Again, lots of houses competing, but in this cliquey little town you need to pay dues and join the business owners association...by fighting each other.

this was a pretty great scene, but only to be overshadowed by another scene where Master Yip takes on a whole wharf of kung fu fighters (and some past rivals as well) fending off foes with wooden pallets, among other things.

The climax of the film comes when the master takes on a totally racist British prize fighter, for the honor of the Chinese warriors. Then Master Yip makes a really touching speech about how Chinese people are modest and that we all need to be accepting of each other. Also, baby Bruce Lee shows up.

Fight choreography: awesome

Protagonist likeability: i want to take this guy out for a cup of coffee and discuss things, maybe share family pictures

Story believability: negative. This man is a super man.

 

What can we learn from this movie? Even though we are all different, we can respect each other. Master Yip is an admirable role model and a global treasure.

COMMANDO AKA DIE HARD:THE PREQUEL, BEST 80s ACTION MOVIE? or BEST 80s ACTION MOVIE EVER?

Ahnold S. is in this one, if you werent familiar, and popular lore says that DIE HARD was supposed to be the sequel to this flick. Wow. Awesome. Prett much goes like this:

Ahnold eats a sandwich:

Someone drives a car through the dealership window, killing/wounding a salesman (classic!):

Ahnold gets some guns and plays with face paint:

I wish I could have taken more photos from this show but blah de blah copyright blah blah you wouldnt download a pizza?

 

What can we learn from this movie? Drive a bulldozer through the surplus store window and you're bound to find a bazooka.

Escape from New York: Badass cast of Badasses

Snake Plisskin, a name a really awesome mother would name their child. This is a ESCAPE movie with Lee van Cleef, Isaac Hayes, Ernest Borgnine and Kurt Russell. John Carpenter is an awesome director and uses awesome explosions, sweet
guns, gliders and chicken-style car chases through bomb-booby-trapped bridges.

Awesome movie and kind of relative to the current occupation of New York, considering the plane was being flown by an aviatrix/activist for the "workers".

What manliness can be learned from this movie? Stand up for yourself and stick it to the man.

DOUBLE FEATURE: BLOODSPORT & JCVD: JEAN CLAUDE LIKES A CROWD

Look at this

Look at it. Is that possible?

Mr. Bloodsport is young. He's a fighter. He plays videogames. His best pal at the big fight ("kumite") is the tough guy from the "important" (#1&2) episodes of the NERDS movie franchise. Jean Claude's character learned from a guy who was miscast and should have been played by Sonny Chiba. Whatever.

Bloodsport is great entertainment. He beats up a Syrian fighter, a muay thai fighter, and a sumo wrestler aaaaaaand you're gonna have to figure out if he beats the champion.

Look at it. Look at his face. That is a face of a guy who has been in budget action movies for almost 2 decades. Looks old, huh?

JCVD is a movie where Mr. JCVD (Jean Claude Van Damme) comes clean and admits to all his wrongs and blah blah blah blah

THERE ARE HISTORICAL INACCURACIES. HERE'S ONE:

In the second scene where the video store clerks are talking about how JCVD is a great movie hero because he doesn't beat up "middle eastern" bad guys. WRONG. As shown in JCVD's first REAL role(previous roles: Guy dancing in the background, Gay Karate Man, Car Driver, et al thanks wikipedia) in BLOODSPORT he defeats a SYRIAN fighter. Syria is right in the middle of the middle east.

at least we got a semi good facepalm photo from JCVD. good movie though.

 

Tonight: REPO MAN

Tomorrow: THE ROOM AND FINALE REVIEW

Rambos: first blood was good

There's one more photo I want to add from Rambo (the 4th one) but I'm posting this from my rotary phone and it only allows 5 photos.

Here's what to learn:
1. Don't get fat
2. Remember what you're here for
3. Try not to be a victim of circumstance, try to be an active posi force for the world

MARKED FOR DEATH: PRE IRONY

And if not ...

Steven Segal plays a retired operative that worked across the border trying to stop drug lords

There's Steven Segal's buddy Danny Trejo early in his awesome career.

What can be learned from this movie?

1. secret twins exist.

2. try to keep away from your previous occupation when you retire.

(Yesterday): RAMBO RETROSPECTIVE

(Today): DIE HARD QUADRILOGY (cancelled due to unavailability) BACK TO THE FUTURES

LONE WOLF MCQUAID: MAKINGS OF A CONSERVATIVE OR A DRUNK

Chuck Norris internet meme

Chuck Norris kicks up Kung Fu's David Carradine

Things to learn from this movie

1. chuck norris thinks beer is more important than vitamins and vegetables

2. chuck norris would rather live in squalor than not

3. chuck norris should have taken steve mcqueen's advice and taken acting lessons

 

Tonight: Compare and contrast:DeathRace and DeathRace 2000

Tomorrow: DIRTY DOZEN

HIGHLANDER: PUTS THE DECAPITATION IN DECAPITATIONS

There are epic movies and then there are movies like this. Battles in the high land with guys carrying battleaxes and shouting. Then an immortal race comes up but THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE

So there's fights to the death on top of muscle cars, decapitations, car chases, nazis getting shot with machine guns, etc etc.

This movie is pretty awesome

What manliness can you learn from this movie?

1. Don't bring a gun to a sword fight

2. Read books, you might meet the author and the author is hot and likes you.

 

 

Tonight: THE GOOD THE BAD THE WEIRD

Tomorrow: ANGEL HEART

 

PREDATOR PLETHORA: YELL AT SOMETHING

Predator (1987)

Predator 2 (1990)

AVP: Alien Vs. Predators (2004)

Predators (2010)

 

Tonight: Our Man Flint

Tomorrow: TBD

A MOVIE ADAPTATION OF CHUCK PALAHNIUK'S BOOK: DO IT RIGHT

Tonight: CONVOY

Tomorrow: COLD WEATHER